It has just started to sink in that I’m going to have a book out in the big bad world on May 30th.
This has been a dream for so long, I think I only now understand what I’ve been working toward since I was a little girl.
I have been crazy enough to put words to a page and publish it so that OTHER PEOPLE CAN READ IT AND JUDGE WHETHER IT’S WORTH THEIR MONEY AND TIME.
I mean, really. What was I THINKING?
I have no one to blame but my own persistent self. My book is going to be out there, for better or for worse, in all its brand-new, wobbly-legged glory. And people will be free to hate it, or love it, or not even notice its existence.
They never tell you how very bone-deep scary that is. I’m just an ordinary person, after all. Not better or worse than any other person with dreams. But from now on, I will have to live up to a standard that includes pulp writers and Nobel prize winners alike.
Part of me just wants to beg the world to be gentle.
The other part reminds me that no matter what, I did it. I have accomplished a dream that I’ve had almost as long as I’ve been alive. And there’s absolutely no-one that can take that away from me.
We all know the old adage. Be careful what you wish for–you just might get it. Well I wished for it, and I got it. Now, I guess, you’ll have to tell me honestly what you think. And I’m a big girl. I’m supposed to be able to take it.
But that whole ‘thick skin’ thing? It’s a total myth. So, yeah. Here I am. Still a bundle of nerves and feeling as green as the first time I put pencil to paper.
Just…be gentle. Okay?